Rick the Dick was a story I wrote for Kathryn Falk’s Bordella series back in 2004. Thought I would share it with you.
RICK THE DICK! The words leapt off the page at Caroline as she sat and looked at her newest client in the back of a rented stretch Limo. She read the pages and seriously hoped it was a case of Jealousy and Alpha-male syndrome. Caroline didn’t normally do this sort of therapy but knew her friend needed help when Laurie called her a few weeks ago. “Caroline, I have a favor to ask you. I’m concerned about one of my employees.” “Laurie I don’t really work in employee relations.” “I know sweetie, it’s a male employee.” “Are you seeing one of your employees? If you are, I don’t recommend it.” Laurie started laughing on the other end of the phone. “Heavens, No! Jeanne would have my head on a platter.” “I don’t think I understand then.” Laurie went on to explain about the Women’s Executive Club and how they believed in giving women only the best in Spa treatments, Dining Experiences, Parties for Charity and of course MEN! She went on to explain how Rick came to be employed at the Club and how over the past few months his client list was declining. Members of the male staff were referring to him as ‘Rick the Dick’. Laurie was concerned that Rick’s attitude might extend into the bedroom and was hesitant on recommending him to the clientele. She thought about removing him from the company’s red leather book. Laurie wanted Rick evaluated to see if he could be brought back to stellar performance before her hand was forced to remove him. “That’s pretty much everything Caroline. So here’s what I’m thinking-“
“Laurie before you go creating a scenario, which I have to memorize, can I
ask you one question?” Caroline cut her off.“Sure, honey.”
“Would I have a case file?” Laurie told Caroline about Case Files for all the female clientele, which listed all of the preferences, excluding nothing. Some went so far as to include special interests and background information. These files helped prospective companions treat the Club’s patrons accordingly.
Caroline could almost hear Laurie analyzing the question with a pen in her mouth. “I believe I would make one, because I wouldn’t want an employee blind-sided.”
“Well then here’s what I’m thinking….”
And with that the two colleagues designed a plan for Rick. Caroline was somewhat uncomfortable. She’d never done anything like this to analyze a patient. It would be best to act as if it were a date. Caroline dressed as such wearing her blonde hair down and contacts instead of her glasses. She went slightly conservative with a black turtleneck, camel suede pants and opted for two-inch heel boots to give her five-foot frame a little more height.
Caroline knew Rick would be standard six-foot or so standard cover model types based on Laurie’s description of The Bordella’s men and their services offered. She admitted surprise at Laurie going into women’s sexual therapy. It contrasted with the lady who counseled her through one of the most difficult times in her life. Perhaps after Laurie’s son was born, counseling children became harder. Laurie inspired Caroline to go into counseling and she started out counseling married couples right out of school. She was fascinated by what drew people together, especially what attracted women to the men in their lives. It prompted her to write “The attraction of the Alpha-Male” which began her occasional free-lance writing career.
Caroline then counseled single-men, shortly after which she wrote “The Alpha-male’s insecurities” and “The Beta-male’s complexities” Caroline didn’t consider herself an expert of the opposite sex, but sometimes felt she could get past men’s barriers a little easier than most of her gender. The limo stopped. Caroline stared out the window; the building was beautiful. She stepped out of the limo in awe of the structure, beyond anything she’d seen in her life. Caroline was out of her element and questioned whether this was the right thing to do. She was giving “Rick” a pass/fail grade and his career lay within her hands. If his career wasn’t in trouble Laurie wouldn’t have called her. Career! Could you even call it that? It was more like a gigolo lifestyle, a very decadent one. It should be every man’s dream job. Sleep with a different woman every night. No-strings attached. She reached the entrance and the door man let her into one of the most opulent edifice Caroline could imagine.